The thing about being a stay at home mom is that you don’t miss anything. Nothing. Ever. Not one thing. And if you do happen to miss a certain minor detail of a short person’s life, it will be relayed to you in tiny, confusing details that you must piece together and you are only freed from this guessing game when you put the puzzle together...you...and your sister were...playing dinosaurs...and...someone...got hurt? She punched you in the face? You pulled her hair? She pinched you? SHE PINCHED YOU! Got it. Okay. Now get the fuck out of my face and go play. Mommy’s Facebooking.
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